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JOKES

Jokes That Make You Go Hmm?

Jokes that make you go hmm  –  Page 1   Page 2

  • Ever wonder how much deeper the oceans would be without sponges?
  • If light travels faster than sound,
    is this why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
  • Have a Laugh on Us
  • He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
  • Why is it called rush hour when the traffic is moving the slowest?
  • If love is blind, why is so much money spent on lingerie?
  • If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
  • If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
  • If you only have one TV, why do they call it a TV set?
  • Why is a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
  • A fine is a tax for doing something wrong.
    A tax is a fine for doing so well.
  • Why is a man who invests all your money called a broker?
  • If the person who plays a piano is called a pianist,
    why isn't the person who races cars called a racist?
  • If people from Poland are called Poles,
    why don't we call people from Holland Holes?
  • If tin whistles are made out of tin,
    what do they make fog horns out of?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen are defrocked, shouldn't . . . ?
   electricians be delighted
   musicians be denoted
   models be deposed
   tree surgeons be debarked
   cowboys be deranged
   dry cleaners be depressed
  • If your parents never had children, it's a good bet that you won't either.
  • Why do you go to sleep when your alarm clock is on, but wake up when it goes off ?
  • Never be afraid of trying to do something new.
    Remember it was amateurs that built the ark and professionals that built the Titanic.
  • How can a cemetery raise its price on a burial and blame it on the cost of living?
  • Is it possible to buy a complete chess set in a pawn shop?
  • Why do you believe it when someone says there are 3 billion stars, but have to touch the item with the wet paint sign?
  • It's said the early bird gets the worm, but I say it's the second mouse that gets the cheese. (Think about it!)
  • Speed is relative.
    A bus goes twice as fast when you're trying to catch it as it does when you're riding in it.

 

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